Actor and cosplayer Chloe Dysktra has opened up to her fans with a post detailing an emotionally abusive relationship she was involved in for years.
The other party, who according to her is a well respected member of the geek community and extremely powerful, established rules for her from the start. Initially, he allowed no photos of their time together, or for her to speak at public places, demands which included forcing her to stay in their hotel room while attending Comic-Con International in San Diego together for the first time.
From there, the relationship became even worse, as Dykstra’s Medium post detailed episodes ranging from emotional manipulation to outright sexual assault. “When the cameras were on us, he was a prince,” she writes, “Turn them off, he was a nightmare.” She has added that she has both audio and visual proof to back up her words, but has opted not to release them for her ex’s sake in the hope that he’ll “do the right thing.”
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Dykstra’s relationship took a clear toll on her; she lost massive amounts of weight inshore spans of time, and shut herself off unless she was spoken to while in her ex’s presence. After being with him for approximately three years, during which time she claims he effectively blacklisted her from potential job prospects with the help of another woman, she finally ended the relationship.
Despite the work she’s done to move on, Dykstra stated she is now sharing her story to serve as closure so she can truly move forward, concluding with a quote from Bojack Horsemen which also served as the inspiration for her story’s title: “‘You know, it’s funny; when you look at someone through rose-colored glasses, all the red flags just look like flags.’”
“Please, please, keep an eye out for those red flags.”