The fifth and final issue of the Kick-Ass vs. Hit-Girl crossover finally decides who wins their fight in a brutal result in the Albuquerque desert.
WARNING: The following contains spoilers for Kick-Ass vs. Hit-Girl #5 from Steve Niles, Marcelo Frusin, Sunny Gho and John Workman, on sale now.
Kick-Ass vs. Hit-Girl has spent more time with its titular heroes running from or chasing down a drug cartel in Albuquerque than fighting each other. While the two violent vigilantes have had some brief clashes, Hit-Girl made it clear to Patience they have to finish their showdown. After all, she has nothing but hatred for Patience for warping the green and yellow costume that Dave worked so hard to prop up as a symbol as hope and justice.
And as Kick-Ass vs Hit-Girl #5 shows, their rivalry finally crowns a winner in a most brutal fashion.
Mindy invites Patience to a part of town that looks like a Western. In the desert, she knows no one will hear them shooting each other and cutting one another up, so this is the perfect setting to settle their conflict. Mindy does give Patience time to confess, though, as she sits on her bike wanting to know why she’d taint the Kick-Ass costume like that.
Patience tries to tell her that despite forming her own cartel, her actions were all to bring down other criminals and get money for various charities. In short, she wanted to use crime and the legal system to work for her, especially after being treated poorly by the government after her military career. Mindy, ultimately, doesn’t care about her reasons, behaves aggressively and kicks off the brawl.
Hit-Girl has always been skilled at fighting, and those talents are on full display here. She takes whatever punches and kicks Patience can throw, and responding in kind with bullets and shurikens. Patience isn’t out for blood, however, but Mindy is,. When Patience hides in a saloon, Mindy breaks out the big guns, literally, to finish the job with a bazooka.
Patience tries to escape in her van but Mindy blows it up, leaving Hit-Girl to walk over to the charred corpse. She inspects, insults it and leaves, but Patience is alive and well, as she used a decoy and dressed the body up. The actual victim in the blast is her former general, Maria, who died a few weeks back in the war with Russians and the Mexicans. It explains why Patience went to her grave in the previous issue, as she needed a fresh fake body. With Mindy gone, Patience retires the Kick-Ass costume and after getting accepted to university, she celebrates with her family, grateful Mindy never found out her true identity and that she’s finally gotten the young vigilante off her back.
Ultimately, this ending lets both characters walk away winners in their own way. While Hit-Girl won the battle against Kick-Ass, Patience proved that she was a more tactical thinker. In her own way, she defeated Kick-Ass too by finally getting to a point where she could move on with her life.
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